78 days?!? That's what my little baby ticker on my blog says. 78 days until I get to meet the little ball of craziness that keeps kicking my insides! 78 days until I get no more sleep. 78 days til all chaos breaks loose in my life.
I am not exaggerating when I same I am absolutely terrified. I finally feel like my life is somewhat manageable in terms of taking care of Wyatt. He sleeps a little later (6:30, 6:45-ish). He can play on his own. He knows not to drink bleach or eat the cat poop. I can check my email and the only problem is that he maybe drew on himself with a ballpoint pen.
The terrified-ness comes from the fact that I can still barely handle the one child I have. What the heck am I supposed to do with two? The people I know with two or more kids have not helped me rectify this terrified feeling. Secondly, because I am not working, it will be like all-day every-day frazzled-ness. At least when I was working I felt like I had some grown-up time and conversation and wasn't covered in puke, pee, or other substances all day. I seriously think I might lose it with two.
And don't even get me started on how much I'm looking forward to breastfeeding again. I know, I know, it's better for the baby. But you know what's better for me? Not having my boob feel like it's being ripped off by an 8-pound bundle of joy or put in a machine and being rung out like it's a washcloth. I think I'd rather drive the wrong way down the Japanese highway outside my back door. Oh wait, I already did that today.
Hmm... guess I'm not feeling very maternal today. Maybe tomorrow.
1 comment:
Do you know what boob soothies are? Amazing! I am sending you some. And I hope I didn't contribute to your concerns =) I won't lie, the first 2 weeks with 2 sucked, but as I learned about GG and Luke adjusted to sharing me - its fine. Just some days he watches a lot of veggie tales while I deal with GGs issues. Plus the first two months the baby will sleep A LOT (makes me wonder what I did with all my free time back then with just one newborn) and I had SO much time with Luke - we did something fun together every day, just the two of us and that was really helpful. You handle stress so incredibly well and your ability to multi task is even better, it will all be fine! 78 days!! Woohoo!!
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