I applied for a job about a month ago. It's a great job, something I know a little about but would allow me to gain new skills that are easily transferable back to the university setting once we're through with our tour here, and would pay enough to pocket some extra money even after daycare. A friend with the inside track helped me with the application process (it's a federal job) and put in a good word for me, and even went with me to watch the kids in the car while I turned in my application.
Even before I turned in the application I started feeling guilty about even thinking about putting the kids in child care and taking a job. About two minutes after I applied, I felt really guilty. And two days later it occurred to me that they might actually hire me. Pretty soon, I was hoping they wouldn't even call me for an interview.
Well, I got my wish. Although I was rated as qualified by HR, they hired an internal candidate without interviewing other applicants... and I was actually happy about it! The thought of missing out on milestones, beach days, and stuff like swimming lessons with the kids made me sad. It was then that I realized that I actually wanted to stay home with the kids. And suddenly I had a whole new perspective on not working. It was like the lightbulb just went on somehow, and suddenly I was at peace with life here in Okinawa.
While I think there are other factors in play here that have contributed to me finally getting in the groove, apparently the answer has been staring me in the face this whole time. I guess sometimes it takes the prospect of losing what you've got to appreciate it. Hmm. Like I didn't know that already.
4 comments:
Amen sista! >:O)
Yeah! I'm glad going through the "process" help you realize life was good as is. Who would want to work when you could spend 3 out of 5 week days playing in the water, anyway?!?! I am glad you are at peace.
Rock on! Funny, I just finished reading a controversial article on this very topic on Parentdish.com, but you said it WAY better than she did!
You will never regret spending these three years with your small children...those are the best years, even though they don't remember all those fun times at that early age like you think they will...it's still awesome making all those memories and not having the stress of a job, getting everyone off to daycare & picking up and keeping the household going while Tommy concentrates on his work. A stay-at-home mom needs to be commended....cause it's "NOT ALWAYS EASY", but some day you'll look back at it being the best thing that could have happened.
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